Monthly Archives: September 2008

Carefully considering his options, Otis Green is an aging baby boomer and a guy so nice that even his houseboys like him. He usually spends most of his time sitting in his tree house, enjoying his herbal remedies and watching the world go by but something has come up. A bizarre infection is forcing him to go to the doctor and he is told that he must first bathe in order to receive care. Unfortunately, soap is a rare commodity in Rancho Del Dildo, California, especially at the end of the month when one can’t trade an entire pound of pot for even a single bar. Fearing the end may be near and wanting to recapture his youth, he hitchhiked to the nearby bay area and began frolicking around where he happened upon one Sunshine Streisenberg in a local coffee shop. Being a woman of comparable age and mindset, the two quickly hit it off and she soon after convinced him to go skinny dipping. In one swoop miracle, all his problems were solved. Their companionship wouldn’t end there. Despite having breasts which had suffered the toll of never having known a bra, he quickly fell in love with her. The two now spend their days cultivating various plant life while feeding and fighting for the protection of the increasingly endangered squirrel in an effort to stop global warming.

Ahhhhhhh!

By Erik

I was sitting at my computer early one morning and working on my web page that I felt was less than adequate at the time. I had the TV in the room across the hall turned up so that I could listen to F&F while I was entrenched in the tech madness. Little did I know that my online activities would soon be the absolute least of my concerns. Shortly before the show was over, word came in about the first plane hitting one of the Twin Towers. I immediately abandoned the work at hand and ran across the hall to park myself in front of the tube where I sat for several hours without so much as getting up to grab a beer or a bite. My stomach hasn’t forgiven me to this very day. About 6 months later, I went back to work on my web page again but couldn’t do so after looking at the date on all the files.

By Sandi

I had just dragged my butt out of bed that morning to get ready for work, and was still shaking off the sleep and waiting for the coffee to be ready when I looked at the tv down in the den andsaw that a plane had just hit the first Tower. I guess it’s because I was still trying to wake up that I thought that I was watching a new trailer for a movie soon to be released. Then the second plane came screaming through the city andplowed right through the second Tower. I couldn’t believe what I was seeing! This couldn’t be real could it? “My God, what the hell is going on”, I thought to myself. Then when it sunk in that this was a terrorist attack on our country, I felt sick to my stomach. Then when the Towers collapsed and crumbled into dust, I had a feeling of panic, sadness, and nausea that still bothers me to this day every time I see footage of what happened. This was the most senseless, heartless, evil, cold blooded thing that has ever happened in our country’s history. Thousands of people died that day for no reason other than they got on a plane that was taken over by madmen. The feelings I had that day come back just as strong every September 11, and they always will. 

By Bryan

5-25-2001:  I graduate High School.

A month after that, my mother and step-dad had already planned a trip up to NYC and the New England area. I mention I’ve never been on a flying vacation with them and they said that’s right, so why don’t you tag along as your graduation present. I say Hell Yes! 

We go to CT, MA, VA, DC, RI, DE, NJ, andlast but not least, NY. We spend a few days in NYC. The 2nd day there, we go to the World Trade Center. We go inside and take our picture down in the lobby only to be overcharged to pick it back up again, but we pay for it. Between that picture and picking that up, we go to the top. We go to the small little eateries at the top and do some tourist shopping. I go outside on the observation deck. While I’m up there I invite my mother and step-dad to join me. They do. On the top of the WTC at the observation deck, there is a looking glass thing where you pay $.50 or something to look out of binoculars at the city. I pay the $.50 and look across the way to the Empire State Building. There are people out there doing the same thing looking at my direction. I wave, and they see me, all the way across town, and they wave back. That same trip, we spent 4th of July in NYC on the river watching the fireworks.

9-11-2001

It’s my first year away at college and I’m a freshman at Florida Southern College located in Lakeland, FL. It’s a wretched Tuesday which means I have an 8 a.m. class… Western Civilization II, with a boring monotone professor. Normally I would have skipped but I went that day. I stumble out of bed and put on my red college t-shirt, khaki shorts, and sandles. I quickly go to the cafeteria and grab a bowl of cereal and some toast, and I munch that down just in time to make it to class. I sit through class and the class ends, andI walk to my secondclass that day which was Intro. to Criminal Justice… on the way to class a friend caught me before I go in and asked if I had heard what happened in New York. I say yeah, of course (because a week or two before the events happened a sky jumper landed his parachute on the torch of the Statue of Liberty.)  I walk into class and only then did I grasp what he was talking about. I couldn’t believe what I was hearing from my classmates. So, class ended and I rushed back to the dorm hall and watched it on TV I couldn’t believe what I saw… the towers have collapsed. I rush upstairs to my room and grab the phone and dial the calling card andcall my mother. She answers “Hello”. I say “Holy shit.” That’s the first words out of my mouth to my mother after this. I was so confused as to what was going on. It was my first time really away from home. I talk to mother for about 15 min. Then I start calling other family members to talk to them. The time then passed on to about 2:00 p.m. andI was outside looking at the sky trying to joke with people that hopefully the terrorists weren’t going after the biggest collection of Frank Lloyd Wright architecture. I couldn’t believe that no flights were going to happen for a few days. Disney shut down. Chicago mostly shut down. Los Angelesshut down. Everything around me was upside down. I didn’t know what to make of it. I couldn’t stop looking at the pictures of everything on TV and on the Internet. There was a crawl at the bottom of our student channel saying that our Resident Advisorscould counsel us. I needed someone to talk to. So, I asked him in my room at around 8:30 p.m. and we talked for a while and I cried andI cried to him. He was very understanding, but later then did I realize all I needed was a hug from my mother. That always seemed to make everything okay. So, that weekend, my mom and step-dad drove up to see me and I needed that so badly. I needed someone to hug and talk to and a friendly face. 

Present day:

I look back and think about what if…. what if the terrorists had attacked us the time I was up in NYC? What if they attacked the WTC while I was still inside? 

I think about what happened to the people who were working up there that day and the people I vaguely remember seeing when I was atop the WTC. How many of them died? I think about the people on the plans, what they thought when the plane was crashing in? I wonder if the people felt any pain. I wonder what it would have been like to escape from the building. I wonder what it would have been like to help people out. I remember the hardcore patriotism displayed by our fellow Americans. The lines at blood banks to donate to the people up in NYC. The red, white, and blue worn and displayed on peoples cars and clothes. The thing that gets me most: Looking at the walls of pictures left behind by family members trying to locate their loved ones, with their only hope being left to a picture on a wall, with what floor and company they worked on, and a telephone number — in hopes that some random stranger might see that flyer and recognize a face that they may have seen.

By Kitty

September 11, 2001 seemed like such a normal day to me. I was a happy go lucky “gaijin” living abroad…I went to work in the morning, had lunch with my co-workers, finished working, met friends for shopping-dinner-drinks-jokes, returned home for a little R & R before bed…andthen, around 10 PM, came the phone calls. A lot of phone calls. Asking if I were watching the TV. Everyone telling me how sorry they were. I turned on the TV, frantically flipping through the channels. So little information…surely I was misunderstanding what the announcers were saying. Then my Boss called…”get a taxi andcome down to the station NOW”  My friends/co-workers met me in the Control Room at the station. They were withme as I stared in shock at the collapse of the towers…they were with me as I cried seeing the horror replayed over andover…they sat withme all night long as we watched the various feeds from around the country…they dialed the phone for me for hours as I tried to contact my family in Ohio…they did their best to comfort andconsole me…they mourned with me. When “people” say how “hated” America is…I remember that night and the reactions of my Japanese friends. And I think about the days after, when total strangers would stop me on the street and express sympathy/support for me and my fellow countrymen.

Halfway around the world, in Japan, I felt completely helpless. I couldn’t believe what had happened. I was confused, and sad, and ANGRY!  But then, as I watched strangers helping strangers, and heard of the everyday heroes risking themselves for their Fellow Human Beings, and learned about the patriots of flight 93 who said NO to the terrorists at the cost of their lives…I felt PROUD. These were AMERICANS. They were strong, compassionate, selfless, and brave in the face of such evil. They, no, WE would not be broken by homicidal cowards. I was no longer a “gaijin”…I was an “Americajin”. And I thanked God that I was!

You may liken the lovely Governor to a hurricane hitting a desert. Sarah Palin is nothing short of a gift from Almighty God unlike any other. Ronald Reagan is back in a skirt, lipstick and some really cute glasses. The DemocRATS are naturally terrified of a woman who has more balls than all the libtards on Earth combined. One can’t recall a point in our nations history when a running mate had such an impact on the campaign. It’s facinating to think that a presidential election might actually be ultimately decided by a candidates pick for VP as Palin’s favorability rating is higher than that of both Obama and McCain. As if that weren’t enough, the MSMs ruthless and relentless bombardment of lies and distortions about this woman is already backfiring. The Republican ticket has shot up to a substantial lead in what are already intentionally skewed polls as tons of women and swing voters are rallying to it. Chris Matthews is probably crying himself to sleep every night for fear that his dream of being the Monica under Barry’s desk will never come true. He and Ogremann should be thankful that their bosses didn’t give them the chance to hang themselves. With a Democrat such as Kinky Friedman now predicting that McCain and Palin will “waltz right into the White House”, what will the libtards do now other than continue to spread lies and shed tears? We suggest that they consider moving abroad. Nations such as China and Cuba are rumored to offer them the exact kind of policies they claim to prefer. Now, if you’ll excuse us, we need to purchase massive amounts of stock in tissues. In a related story, Barry Hussein is said to be investing in cosmetics and agriculture.

The question in the previous thread about Governor Palin has now been answered.

In an election year full of historical milestones, we now get the most hopeful one of all in the form of an authentic conservative on the ticket.

The cretins in the MSM question her ability to lead given her 5 children, 1 with special needs and daughter who is pregnant at the age of 17. In addition to the blatant hypocrisy of contradicting the idea of empowering women which the left has always claimed is one of their greatest goals and achievements, the same liberal slime didn’t dare question Biden’s decision to take his Senate seat in 72 when he was dealing with a dead wife and daughter and 2 injured sons. Instead, he was sworn in next to his son’s bed in the hospital.

Could this be because she’s a normal person who knows what it’s like to live from paycheck to paycheck rather than an elitist prick living in an ivory tower?

Could it be because those elitist pricks fear that she may expose their corruption?

Could it be because she will empower real Americans rather than the elitist pricks who want to make our decisions for us?

Could it be because she’s actually more experienced and more qualified for the presidency than Barry Hussein?

We contend that it’s all of the above. We also not only contend that she will be the first female VP but that she will someday be the first female POTUS as well. Obama, the MSM and the rest of the left wing hypocrites will soon be walking on broken glass as their sexist nature is exposed by a true feminist.

HEAR HER ROAR!!!